Yes, there are times when we need to look hard at where we are versus where we thought we’d be.
When I had a significant knee injury as well as an issue with my opposite foot, I was out of practice for awhile as I worked on healing from my surgeries. This was really frustrating for me as an active person who somewhat defines myself through contribution and loves what I do. I was angry, upset and feeling a loss of control. Everything changed, but not in the way I had envisioned.
I was not proud of how I handled a number of situations but those who knew me, knew my actions came from my frustration and inner turmoil. They continued to support and draw from me the “what’s next” step. Rather than focus on the “what’s wrong”, it was better to focus on the “what’s still right”. Rather than focus on the loss, it was best to focus on “the what’s hidden opportunity you’ve not yet seen”. Rather than be in chaos, the lesson was to be present with what is, so I could move my energy to something better. The chaos was the opportunity to re-create order on a new level.
Through this expectations needed to be reset. Taking stock of where I was (i.e., my current reality) and let go of where I felt I ‘ought’ to be. In resetting expectations, I looked at what I did have, what was important to me and changed my mind by deciding to make the best of things. This helped me heal. This helped reduce my reaction. This helped my creativity.